Zuma camp calls for discipline until 2010, all bets off after that

PIETERMARITZBURG. Jacob Zuma's camp has asked his militant supporters to show restraint until after the 2010 World Cup so as not to endanger the staging of the event. However once the event was over, said a spokesman, "cadres should feel free to uphold democracy in whatever manner they choose, using whichever projectiles and flammables come to hand."

Observers say this is the first time the Zuma camp has made any effort to curb the confrontational rhetoric of the Mkhonto we Sizwe veterans and ANC Youth League members who have vowed to plunge the country into chaos if Zuma is found guilty of corruption, or if he is given his day in court, or not, or something, just because.

The reading of the statement was delayed briefly while paramedics treated an elderly woman whose wooden replica AK-47 had become entangled in her leopard-skin bra, leaving her with severe splinter-related injuries.

According to the statement it was essential for Zuma's supporters not to do anything that could jeopardize the pension plans of either Zuma or the National Executive Council.

"Cadres must understand that the 2010 World Cup is going to make the party and a number of senior comrades extremely rich, and when senior comrades are rich, democracy is rich," read the statement.

"We therefore call upon them to behave in a way that goes against their more incendiary democratic urges, and to refrain from performing acts of love for Msholozi that involve threats to kill, eliminate, remove or otherwise terminally inconvenience political opponents."

It went on to state that Fifa and European policy-makers were not familiar with South African democratic traditions.

"What we call rolling mass action, they call mob justice. What we call lobbying, they call intimidation. What we call the fruits of liberation, they call a bribe."

It said that these were "ugly Eurocentric terms", but that they would have to be tolerated for the time being.

Meanwhile Zuma's camp has confirmed that it is working on a contingency plan to deal with possible fallout if the World Cup is withdrawn from South Africa at the eleventh hour.

Dubbed 'Operation Jump Up And Down', the plan involves "burning some railway carriages, emptying municipal rubbish bins onto pavements, and breaking down the symbols of capitalist greed, such as shop windows and display cabinets of electronics goods stores, cell phone vendors, and branches of American Swiss".

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